Castle Crashers - More manly than God's testicles

Quite possibly the best arcade game on the marketplace, with a 4 player online/offline co-op/

Basically, you play as a man who has a sword and slaughters people. There, that is the entire game in 1 sentence. Thats it, no really, it is all there is and ever will be of this game.

The story line is, not that it matters, you live in a castle and semmingly head-bang all day long to renassiance music. Untill the castle party is crashed and 4 princesses are stolen by many dirty, dirty, horny, dirty Dan-like people. These people run off into the forest with the whores to have there dirty way and its up to you, and the 5,000 pathetic soldiers that couldn't tell you which team they are on to retrieve them and for no apparent reason. Kiss them when you save their dirty whore asses and more than likely catch AIDS off their dirty whore face's ........... Dirty whores.

Now, when the game begins you are a useless individual who can barely even swing a sword. Just like Nolly. As you progress and rank up you'll learn new combos and upgrade your spells, agility, speed etc. And become God-Like, like God.
There are some strange things in this game. For example, 1 slice of toast turns you into a giant muscle man that has the intelligence of a brick and smashes everything with its fists.
There are tiny, floating animals that sorta buzz around and pick their nose while you murder things.
For some unknown reason there is a giant cat, that likes to box you.

How many other games can you say you float on a corpse down a river while fighting a giant boxing cat-fish?


I think this is the only arcade game you could actually come back too. I don't think any other game has a deer that propels around the forest by using its ass as a rocket booster. You couldn't make that up

I'd reccomened downloading this game and masturbating vigrously over it. As you do, If you don't enjoy this game, please jump through a closed window.

Fans of CoD won't like this, there are more than 2 colours. "Argh, the colours! I'm melting!!"

i played the demo, loved it, brilliant music, it reminded streets of rage only with swords but non the less, very appealing

How much microsoft points is it ?

i got the demo, and i thought it was brilliant
its quite expensive - 1200 microsoft monies

Fuck that ha
Im keepin my microsoft monies for CoD DLC

FBI TOXiiC wrote:Fuck that ha
Im keepin my microsoft monies for CoD DLC

lol, COD,you're better off throwin your money down the sewer.

CoD is such a crappy copy of Counter Strike its unbelievable. Want to play a prope FPS that requires skill, play Counter Strike Source.

you really should play counterstrike, its brilliant

Was playing Castle Crahers with Barry and Breastys earlier......Was fuckin brilliant! It was so funny fighting the last boss and that corn guy with the popcorn haha. Most fun I had on xbox in a while compared to Gears and COD 5. . But be warned we cannot stress this enough there are more than 2 shades of brown........ I know its a big change.

more than 2 shades of brown!!!!
clearly tis the work of satan!!

Got this game last night. Absolutely savage. running around hitting people with a giant sausage whilst a floating giraffe head helps me to level up quicker (god only know why a giraffe head would be able to do that). A little on the expensive side. But definately worth it

Oh yeah and the bit where the owl gets the scutters and shits so much it dies is hilarious

Its over €15 if you pay 27Euro for your points. Thats the price in Gamestop and Xtra Vision

Grissom wrote:Oh yeah and the bit where the owl gets the scutters and shits so much it dies is hilarious

When the deer does it it's even funnier. And then at the end of the level you get to ride it.It's fucking brilliant this game.

Bowe wrote:

Grissom wrote:Oh yeah and the bit where the owl gets the scutters and shits so much it dies is hilarious

When the deer does it it's even funnier. And then at the end of the level you get to ride it.It's fucking brilliant this game.

I knew alot of Dubs were into beastiality but not you too Bowe!

this game is brilliant

Omfg i got this game yesterday and its fucking hilarious haha
Anybody up for a game later?

I made a sig with the Red Knight in it
Whats whit things shittin themselves so much in this game haha